SUCH CONFUSSION

NEWS

2010-03-26T18:20:00.000-07:00

Here we go the latest news from Houston M.D.Anderson hospital ......Just in case you haven't heard the doctors were very happy with my progress on my current chemo drugs and those two spots on my liver well one they can barely see and the other shows significant shrinkage. So they recommends 3 months more of same therapy and then in fourth month a scan to see...and there is a possibility on no more chemo if there gone.....can we say thank you JESUS.

So I still need those prayers y'all been putting up cause them chemo treatments are not pleasant and Brenda still has to put up with my whinning about it!

Thanks for the prayers you have said for me.

For my KATE

2010-01-31T20:01:00.001-08:00

AS most of you know I have temporary guardianship of my grand-daughter and she keeps me on my toes. She also has been growing like a weed currently she is 4ft. 1 in tall and weighs in at 70lbs. Makes it hard to lift her around when we need to go some where. Most of you know she is in a wheelchair and to go somewhere we have to load her in the chair, roll her to the van, unload from wheelchair into car seat then load wheel chair, we do not have a lift in our van.This goes on every time we want or need to go some where. So our need is a wheel chair van, do you know just how expensive those are!! Here is the deal....we have found a used van already equipped with a lift and all we need is $4500.00, so the race starts. I have several plans on how to attack this, the main one is trust GOD to make it possible. My daughter has placed a pay-pal button on her blog for donations to this cause. Any help would be wonderful and if you can't send money I understand, you can always pray for us. Thanks and GOD bless all

HAPPY NEW YEAR AND I'M STILL HERE

2010-01-01T16:16:00.000-08:00

It has been a while since my last post, so let me catch you up.

Yes I still have cancer, yes I'm still taking treatments, yes my faith in GOD is still intact.

Now that's been taken care of let me continue, my treatments and numerous surgerys have taken a toll on my self and my family however we seem to have struggled Thru. And I plan to continue to fight, I had developed a toxicity to one of the drugs they were giving me so my drug therapy has changed. The new one they have me on still causes nausea and it also has another side effect, it gives me a rash that looks like acne and yes it itches like crazy. I have some cream to put on it however it only helps a little.

Other news is I am a granfather for the 4th time. Haven't gotten to hold the little buger yet but there will be time for that later . That's it for now will post more often and thanks.

NEWS AND RAMBLINS

2009-05-02T19:45:00.000-07:00

Yes its been a while since my last post.

So here's the news, recovery went well from my surgery and was preparing to take several more chemo treatments when my incision from my surgery developed a hole, not a big one but it was still a hole in my belly. The doctors here in Odessa decided not to start chemo until that healed all the way, well that took a while. Finally it healed enough that the surgeon here would put another port-cath in my chest and I get to start my chemo Monday.

The bad part is my last c t scan at M.D.Anderson showed another spot on my liver, it is a small one only the size of a Lima bean and the doc there said if he's not happy with the shrinkage the chemo causes then this one would be fairly easy to cut out, at least easier than my last time.

Thank all for your prayers

2009-01-14T09:42:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone, I'm back from Houston and the surgery went well. I had the surgery on December 8, 2008 and was supposed to spend a week in the hospital and be released that didn't happen. I had an infection hiding behind my portacath and once my surgery was done my immune system wasn't strong enough to fight it off. The wife says they nearly lost me twice because of that. But that's why we went to M.D.Anderson, they are the best at this sort of surgery and they removed the portacath and the infection and here I am. I was finally released on December 17 to go home. Then on January 7, 2009 went back for check up, doctors were very happy with my progress and said I was healing well, they also recommended about three more chemo treatments . Once this is done my survival chances are at about 65% that the cancer will not come back. That's not to bad if you consider the first doctor only gave me 18 months.

Thank you all for your prayers, may GOD bless your lives more than you can imagine.

Surgery to come

2008-12-05T18:50:00.000-08:00

This will be my pre surgery thoughts and wishes, to have GOD guide the surgeons hand to give my family strength while they wait to see if all is well and to show the strength that my faith has given me in this time of trial.

I've always considered life as a test, just a test to show how much each person has grown in their personel relationship with GOD. Yes bad things happen to Christians just like they happen to any one else, the difference is how you let it affect you and those around you . I've said this illness was just a tool to use in witnessing and I need to treat it as such. I have been able to talk about GOD and his mercies and the many wonders he has seen fit to allow me to see, I have been allowed to witness about GOD to the toughest people a man like me could witness to,family the people who have seen all my mistakes and know me like no other , the people who watched me in my sin full youth.

LIVE LIFE LIKE YOU WERE GOING TO DIE TOMORROW AND MEET GOD.

Yes I'm very afraid of this Monday and what it has in store for me the surgery, the recovery, the waiting for the biopsy . But GOD has given me a strange kind of peace which will be hard to explain so I will not try, all I can do is trust GOD. His will be done.

New News

2008-11-07T19:46:00.000-08:00

Here we are back from M.D.Anderson cancer center and here's the word from the doctor.

The plan is to gain strenght and not take any more chemo , and eat right of course so that my system can stand the surgery. I'm supposed to go back to Houston December 5th for lab work, an ekg, and talks with doctor and anesthesiologist about what to expect.

In the meantime I will be talking with all the accounting departments about what I already owe and of course what I will owe and trying to find all available funding I might be eligible for to help pay for this.

I think they already have so much invested in me that they have to keep me alive just for a slight chance of them ever getting paid. I just thought I was in debt....wait till I get this bill.

Until then I plan on riding my motorcycle on every nice day, playing with these three gran kids, and giving Brenda all the trouble she can stand....now that sounds like fun.

Please continue to pray for me and I will continue to pray for you.

Just Tired

2008-10-23T10:43:00.000-07:00

Just finished my 19th chemo treatment and I'm sure eveyone has heard the expression "I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired". Believe me I feel that way. On november 3 I have more test at M.D.Anderson cancer center in Houston and then on the 5th the doctors will give me results and discuss surgery to try and remove the infected parts of my liver, sounds like fun don't it!! I must admit the idea of getting cut on was not high on my list of things to have done, however these treatments keep getting worse. They make me sicker while I'm on them and it takes longer to recover. At first a couple of days and I would be allright now it takes almost two weeks before the effects wear off. So maybe surgery is'nt such a bad idea after all.

I still believe GOD can and will take care of me and strenghten my family for whatever he has planned for me. I still believe that this is just a way for me to wittness about GOD's love and to show the faith that I have placed in his hands for so many years now.

Thanks to all who have prayed for me , may GOD's blessings pour forth on you all.

People I've Met

2008-09-26T20:44:00.000-07:00

So most of you know I'm fighting the cancer thing again, and not looking forward to it. However I have some new insights to share with everyone. I was reading this book at the cancer center about other cancer patients about how some of them think its so unfair that they came down with cancer at this time in their lives. One man was in his eighty's another in her thirty's and another still a teenager. Then I looked around the center and saw many different age groups represented and came to the conclusion that there isn't a time in any life when its fair.

I've lived a very interesting life and I've seen some sights , I've been around and been to a lot of places and met some strange and wonderful people. Yes you could say I've had a full life. I haven't always been the best kind of person some one would want to meet and there are things in my past I wish I had never done. I have so many people I should probably apologize to there just may not be time.

So here it is... always live your life like you were gonna die next week.

We need to live our lives to the best of our ability's, always do the right thing, be kind to all people, never do anything to any one you woundn't want done to you. Yes I know if you would just follow a few simple guidelines set down in a little book called the Bible we could all be better off, if I had only known this earlier in my life. There are a lot of people who would be better off because I would have treated them better. I may never have the chance to say I'm sorry to all of them, but I am.

I know that GOD has forgiven me for my sins I just have a hard time forgiving myself.

ROUND 2

2008-08-16T13:49:00.000-07:00

Went in for a checkup and have doctor give me last results of MRI and recieved some bad news. That durn cancer is back, so now we get to start another round of chemotherapy and you all know how much I enjoy that.

So believe it or not its not that big of a deal because I'm not afraid of death just unhappy about having to leave and not see my grankids get big, you know what I mean.

I still believe GOD has a plan for me and will never give me more than I can handel and he will always be there for me. For those who read this blog I hope with all my heart that you have a relationship with GOD and I pray you will not have to go through a experience like mine.

Maybe my witness is to show someone the peace that GOD can give anyone even if the doctors tell him he's gonna die. Not anytime soon, I'm still going for the treatments and whatever else the doctors recomend, but I'm keeping my faith in GOD knowing that if it comes to that I am ready......are you !!

THIS JUST IN !!!!

2008-03-19T21:13:00.000-07:00

Well folks I just returned from my Houston trip, and it was an eye opener.....

I stayed at the local KOA campground in my tent, and I have to admit it wasn't to bad. Most of the folks were friendly and fairly quiet at night. The campground was in pretty good shape and the weather only got bad one night.

Now for the fun part....I finally got to go to Timber Lakes Baptist Church in the Woodlands and give my testimony and thank those people who have been so faithful in thier prayers for me. They gave me a very warm welcome.

And then on monday I went to M.D.Anderson and they did thier tests again, then wed. I returned and had the doctor explain the results to me. Of corse I knew there would be no change from the last test....no spots left on liver....PRAISE GOD.

He wanted to do more testing and I expected that, however I can do that here in Odessa and be at home with my loved ones and just send him the results. He was happy with my overall health and gave me some things to try to get rid of these side effects left over from the chemo treatments.

It is good to be home again!!

Please keep me in your prayers

HAPPY NEW YEAR YA"LL

2007-12-28T10:23:00.000-08:00

OK so its been a year now since I found out I had cancer and started my treatments, that is my three surgical deals and my 14 chemo treatments and in spite of the doctor telling me I had 6 to 18 months to live I feel pretty good.

Now for some bad news , My son in law, daughter, and my 2 grand sons left today on their way to FT. BRAG North Carolina. He's an army guy and you go where the army tells ya to go, however I'm gonna miss those baby's. Auron has always been a handful and Xander was just getting old enough to start playing with, but we already trying to think of a way to go visit next summer some time. For years Melissa has wanted to get out of Odessa and it looks like she finally got her wish, she will need all our prayers for the life of an army wife is not easy, and she has those two rotten boys to care for.

I still need prayer too, I still have more treatments and test coming and you all know Brenda's gonna fall apart pretty soon cause them boys are so far away now .

GOD bless all

WHY ME "LORD"

2007-12-08T15:29:00.000-08:00

I am still amazed at some people at this time of year, why do they do the things they do? I hear folks talking about how hard the times are and how they have been so mistreated by life and I do wonder why I have been so blessed. There are those who have been following my blog and they know that while I haven't had a good year it has been a great year. There I go again saying two things different and meaning the same thing.

I think back about how this year started and how its ending and this has been a great year. I've come to realize that my family means more to me than any earthly riches and have been surprised by the number of people who have prayed for my health and well-being, many of them I have never met,to most of them I'm just a name on their prayer list, and that has been a very good place to be.

So think about your lives and decide what is truly important in life. Would it be that lotto ticket that you might win or the smile on a child's face, how about a brand new pick up , along with those payments or a moment of kindness for a stranger in need, what ever you decide you have to live with it and in the end you know the things that really mean the most.

I've made some of those choices this year

This is the CHRISTMAS season and giving should come easy for us all try not to let the gift buying and the hectic pace get to you remember the real reason for the season

GOD BLESS YOU ALL

Big Trip to Houston

2007-11-05T11:32:00.000-08:00

As most know I've been trying to get the doctors at M.D.Anderson Cancer Hospital to take a look at me, because they are supposed to be the best and they have the latest equipment to check my body out.

Well they finally called and we went and they run me through the ringer with thier test and the doctors there said they could find nothing to operate on!!!

Really no suprise to me. Now I have 2 doctors saying they can no longer find any cancer cells, however they are recomending 2 or 3 more months of chemotherapy and then another round of tests in Houston in March 2008.

God has been at work in my life bigtime and while I have to give the doctors and thier drugs some credit, they are the ones who said I had 6 to 18 months to live so God gets the most praises . I still have a ways to go before I can get back to work , the chemo makes me very ill, so I am asking you to still keep me in your prayers.

Thats all for now...GOD BLESS YOU ALL

GREAT NEWS

2007-09-12T20:43:00.000-07:00

As most everyone knows for the last 9 months I have had the pleasure of doing battle with cancer. Today I went to see the doctor who gave me somewhere between 6 to 18 months to live and got the results from my most recent MRI. And it comes as no surprise to myself or certain family members that the cancer they found has disappeared. The MRI report states that my liver is stable,normal and that the area in question on the last MRI has disappeared.

I will give the doctor some credit for the drugs he had pumped thru my body , however he can't understand how the cancer has just went away.

As for myself ,my family and all those GOD fearing folks out there who have been praying for me, we know the answer. GOD has chosen to heal me he still has something for me to accomplish and so I'm still here.

There are still some more test to run and I still have to get this cath-port removed from my chest so I'm still uncertain when I can resume work, but the days wont seem so long now.

There are too many people to thank ,whom have prayed and supported me through this to list ,besides I'm not very fast at typing, do keep me in your prayers for you will be in mine on a daily basis. May GOD bless you every one.

BIG DAY

2007-06-27T10:55:00.000-07:00

I started this blog as a joke, just cause my daughter and wife didn't think I would...however I have found it gives me a way to speak my mind then go back read it and change my words to say what I really meant. Does that make sense??

June 26 was my anniversary!!!

31 years of married bliss..........RIGHT
The wife and I have had our share of problems over the years and believe it or not they weren't all my fault, I will admit to most of them ,but not all. I believe that GOD put us together for a purpose because of our different talents,ability's,and attitudes. We compliment each other or maybe we cancel out some things. Only GOD knows how or why.

One of my favorite things to say about Brenda is that she has a hard time saying NO to anybody except me, that's not true she really lets me get away with a lot of stuff, all anyone has to do is hint that they need help with anything and she is ready to help and that sometimes spreads her pretty thin, I some times think she should take more time for herself just to relax and recover from all she does. She has been known to volunteer to help at several things and several people at the same time she just has a hard time saying NO!!! EXCEPT TO ME

That's were I come in reminding her about something she has already volunteered for. And some times I even tell her no, its time to slow down, it doesn't always work, but I get to tell her anyway.

So for my wife "HAPPY ANNIVERSARY HONEY" I LOVE YOU MORE

Here's hoping for another 31 years of {married bliss}

GOOD NEWS...I THINK

2007-06-07T21:59:00.000-07:00

On my last visit to the doctor I received the results of my last MRI and it was wonderful.

I"m down to only 2 spots on my liver 1 at 10cm. and 1 at 11cm. and my doc here thinks that should make me a candidate for liver resection surgery. So he has sent a referral to MD Anderson in Houston for me to see their surgeons. And no I"m not looking forward to another surgery, however the other option is less desirable. So now I wait to hear from them and set up an appointment.

GOD has surely been at work here no one can deny that , when this started I was given 6 to 18 months to live now who knows how long I've got.

Those of you who have been praying for me please continue for I believe that has helped more than anything else!!

The love of my life

2007-05-29T22:32:00.000-07:00

For those who don't know I met my wife at a place called Kennys drive inn....it was the local hangout for the cowboy type people. And my first words to her were "TACO VILLA", she was sitting in a friends picup eating taco villa food and it seemeed like a good way to get a better look at her and her friend. So thats how it started, and what a ride its been since.

June 26, 1976 the day we said "I DO"
January 8, 1980 the day my daughter was born
then theres grandkids two I'm spoiling now and one still in the oven.

These past months have been hard on us because of the current problems I am having with my cancer and the treatments required ,however they have only made us stronger in our faith and more committed to our love for each other. She has been and continues to be a wonderful woman who for some unknown reason still cares for me. In spite of some shady things in my past.

There are other things that have happened to us and they have molded the two of us into what we are today, and while I might change some of them if I could, the one thing I could never change is my love and respect for the love of my life...my wife

Good News...maybe

2007-04-24T16:45:00.000-07:00

Started my sixth round of chemo this week and hoping the side affects don't knock me around to bad. However the doctor gave me the test results from my last MRI and it was good.....the lesions or spots on my liver have decreased in number by half and those left show srinkage.

So there may be light at the end of the tunnel after all !

I would still like to thank those who have supported me with thier prayers and by doing what GOD has instructed them to do, you know who you are and I'll continue to covet all those prayers.

Being Practical or not

2007-03-15T11:53:00.000-07:00

Every one that really knows me can say that I'm a very practical person, I always try to plan for the future no matter what. I will admit some of my planning has not gone the way it was planned and things are not as good as they probally should be...

Since my illness has come apon me my family and friends have tryied to get me to loosen up a bit and do some things that I've always wanted to do ,but that practical side of me never let me do, do you know what I mean ? They have already conned me into several road trips and while it was fun well you know what that practical side tells you.

More on my health....

This last session of CHEMO has been the worst stomach was upset, felt tired the whole three days. my platlet count was way down, loss of appitite. And the worst part I made my wife cry again. We were talking about some options on my treatments and my practical side commented about the cost.Its just something I naturally do and .......well she probally isn't thinking much about cost these days.

We were married June 26, 1976...and while it hasn't always been smooth saling there has always been a great deal of LOVE between us. I've made a lot of mistakes over the years and she has always supported me and forgiven me. So for my wife I'm gonna try not to be so practical and mabey she'll let me off again.

GOOD DAYS AND BAD DAYS

2007-02-26T19:07:00.000-08:00

On feb.23,2007 the doctor gave me the results from my MRI and told me I had a dozen spots on my liver that he was certain were cancer. After a short discussion came the hard part he then informed me I probally had 6 to 18 months to live.

The next couple of days were spent with my wife of 30 years and my GOD we did a lot of crying and hugging and praying, my church family on Sunday suprised me with a prayer service for my problem it really shouldn"t have surprised me thats what real CHRISTIANS do, they support you with thier love and prayers.

I"m not going to just wait to die....

God still has a plan for me, what it is I'm not sure, however there are still things I can do . GOD made everything and GOD can do anything, he has opened a door to another treatment in another clinic that I'm looking into and while I continue to fight the good fight I covet your prayers most.

During the times of my life when things have been good I had some people who said they cared for me and maybe I took them for granted ( I've always been some what of a loaner) ,but when things got bad they were still there caring and praying offering help and support and I want them to know how much this means to me.

Thanks to all and may GOD bless you

CHEMO BLUES

2007-02-14T11:26:00.000-08:00

Well I finished my first session of chemotherapy today and it wasn"t to bad,had a little trouble sleeping and had a real problem with the cold weather making my hands tingle,but it never lasted to long.

My sessions take about two and a half days , I go in on mondays and they plug me in to an IV pump that goes to my cath port I spend about two hours with that and then I get a pump connected to my cath port which stays with me over night giving me more chemo, on the second day I go in they dissconnect the pump and put me back on the IV pump for two more hours, then the pump to take home again, on the third day I just wait for the pump to finish with what medicine it has and then they pull the needle out of my cath port. first session done....

Now tomorrow I get an MRI so they can get a better look at my liver, they have some concerns about some spots that the PET scan showed, and they want to get a better look. Probally won"t know about the results till we see the doctor in two weeks.

Untill then I still say whatever his will, I"m ready

Here We Go

2007-01-26T11:17:00.000-08:00

Well we are about to get started with my chemo treatments, So heres an update...The surgery went well and I have been trying to regain my strenght and appitite. The wife will not let me do anything, but she just looking out for me.

So I have to go back to my surgeon and have a cath port in my chest so when I go for my treatments all they have to do is plug me in........we'll just have to see how that goes.

More to come when I know more

GOD bless you all

HAPPY BIRTDAY YOU GOT CANCER

2007-01-05T17:57:00.000-08:00

My christmas and birtday are real close so I don't get as many presents as the rest of the world,however this year I got a special gift......I got sick and went to the doctor and after a weeks worth of tests and exams I was told I had a cancer!!So now I'm looking forward to surgery,radiation and chemo......sounds like fun don't it.

Yes I'm worryed and my family is too, however I've always been the one in the family that has said that GOD will never give us more than we can handle, I hope I'm right.

Those that know my family already know the trials we have had in our past and that we have done alright so far, with those trials have come strenght and maybe a little wisdom along the way. Together we have grown stronger in our faith that GOD will take care of things.

Some people that read this will not understand this next statement...

I'm ready , I'm willing, whatever his will.

If things go really bad I honestly feel that GOD will take care of my loved ones, and if things go well then it gives me more time to help someone else understand the peace you can get from knowing GOD.

GOD bless all

Christmas already?

2006-10-30T17:50:00.000-08:00

Its that time of year again, you know when the stores have all thier CHRISTmas stuff out and its only october. So why don't they just leave it out all year!! I'm kidding of corse,however it still makes me a little bit crazy , knowing that there will be millions of people in the local chain store and you'll have to spend 2 hrs in the check out line. And what about the people who buy as many of the big selling toys as they can get ,save them till december and then ask monster
prices for them, isn't there a law against that if theres not then somebody make one.
So instead of taking my days off and trying to relax I tell the boss I'm available for overtime, and I'll probbally get some. This is necessary cause it just is. Did that make sense?

I don'like signs that proclaim happy holidays when this is really one of the most stressful times a husband/father/granpa can go thru. All the family in your life tell you not to get any thing or just something small, but its your family and well you know the rest.

So merry CHRISTmas all, you notice I know the reason for the season.

Kate and Auron

2006-10-12T21:06:00.000-07:00

ok so we've had all these years with Kate ,those who don't know Kate is handicapped, and you get used to taking care of a child in a certain way. Then along comes this boy who may have had a rough start but its a whole new experience. With Kate you lay on floor and play or you just hold her and love her, with this boy its not quite so easy. When he decides to do something he's gonna do it and you better be watching! Don't get me wrong I enjoy keeping him,but the boy is all boy and a handfull. For other granpa's out there ,it's a joy to hold your grankids and spoil them and send thier mean little butts home.

Boys will be rotten

2006-08-23T15:13:00.000-07:00

Got the pleasure of keeping my granson for the first time by my self to day, we had a good time till he decided to take a dive off the front porch, not sure if he was going up or down the steps all I know is I hear a thump turn around and he is face first on the sidewalk. My daughter didn't seem mad ,but granma hasn't seen him yet. He got two spots on his head that were skined prety good. Cleaned him up put some antibiotic cream on him gave him 10 minutes of loving and he was ready to go again. Oh well boys will be boys and they gonna get skinned and bruised, just makes a granpa fell bad it happens on my watch.

FIRST POST

2006-08-17T13:15:00.000-07:00

The things I've forgotten over the years about almost everything could fill volumes. The things I've learned in that same time I'm not sure I really wanted to know anyway.

Old, bald and getting bolder every day, my life is a constant mess, my family is falling apart, my finances are a shambles, I hate my job, and so many other things keep going wrong I can't seem to keep up with them. On the other hand I have two beautiful grandchildren, Samantha and Auron moon. A daughter, Melissa who gets stronger and smarter every day,and I always know when somethings broke cause she calls and first thing I hear is "I love you dad". Then theres my son-in law#2 ,hes a lot better than son-in-law #1, Darrell is a good man, he still has a lot to learn ,but he loves MELISSA AND THEM ROTTEN KIDS. And of corse theres my wife Brenda who has put up with me for 30 years, sometimes I think she aint very smart.